Thursday, January 31, 2008

Happy Birthday Blue~!

My stupid brit friend is having a birthday. He managed to live for 18 whole years, and will probably live for many years after that, just so he can have an excuse to gripe. His excuse, of course, is that he's old. Old people are apparently allowed to behave however they want.

I have no art to show you because I lost my tablet pen. >| It troubles me.

The other thing that troubles me is people in happy relationships/having happy relationships to look forward to. To quote Rachel, ♥hope.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

city on fire

urghk, I feel like blargh today. I'm so eloquent. But yah, I like.... relapsed with the issues I was having awhile back, where I was just depressed all the time. Letting stuff get me down when I have it relatively well off, and things could get so much worse but they're NOT right now. Expecting the impossible and all that.

So I thought I should remind myself that this weekend was AWESOME. I went to Stockton and visited my nieces and nephews, and my and Kelly an Nikki went to see Sweeney Todd in theaters. We were like the only ones in the theater so we talked through the whole thing, but still enjoyed it. Best movie I've ever seen.

It's men devouring men, my dear,
and who are we to deny it in here?
-Little Priest on the Sweeney Todd soundtrack

Anyways, it was one of the best weekends I'd ever had... but I'm worried I won't be able to be that happy again for a long time, or even ever. See, I'm way negative today. I need to chill. x_x

What's the katter with misses?

Drabble poetry dump 8D

Lurid landscapes plague my mind
And haunt my habitual dreaming
Teary eyed blurred lights for nights
And brooding oil tanks scheming
Electrical towers infinitely incline
over hills where windmills whisper
Moonlight cast through windows where
I should have stayed and kissed her.

Every Day
I pray every day is exactly the way
You wish it would turn out to be
I wish every weekend to see you
I wish every day you could see
That I wish every day would go your way
So you’d be more happy with me.

Every Day 2
I want to be the one to say
I love you, every single day
To be there when you fall asleep
And still there when you wake
When you’re lonely, when you love me
And even when you walk away
I want to be the one to say
I love you, every single day.

Should Have
I should have tightly held your hand
And never let it go
I should have kissed your auburn hair
Beside you in the snow
I should have drawn up close to you
And memorized your smell
I should have called you every day
And asked if you were well
I should have loved you fiercely
When you had gone away
I should have held you close to me
So I’d be holding you today.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008



Some kid in my art class pulled out an animal encyclopedia while the teacher was talking and started copying a walrus, so I just had to TOP HIS ASS. >| Lol...

Oh and Nikki is having a bad day so send mental luvins' to her~<3 She started a blog but ahhh can't remember the url. ;o; I'll link to it when I ask her...

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

omg sick.

I like, have a cold or something... at first it was just headache and coughing, but today my allergies kicked up and I've been sneezing non-stop. Also, being sick makes my asthma go nuts soooo I've been wheezing a lot.

I went to the doctor today and they gave my a physical while I was there. I had to fill out a questionare about things like whether I wore a seatbelt and I'm a lesbian. So the appointment went basically like, "Check your breasts for lumps once a month, and are you interested in a lesbian support group? Oh, you're wheezing. Are you sure you're not interested in that lesbian support group?"

Man though, the wheezing and sneezing and coughing tore up my throat and strained my neck and chest muscles. Now if I move, or sneeze, or cough, or even breath to heavily, my whole shoulder-y area explodes into pain. And my voice sounds weird. And I have two speeches tomorrow. >O


Also, Nikki is supposed to come over this Thursday and I'm going to cook for her. I'm supposed to spend this weekend at her house, doing community service with her (it's for her class requirements) and she's nervous and doesn't want to do it alone. I need to get better, NOW.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

-o- ................. *PROCRASTINATE*

Should be going a six page book report on Lolita right now. .... clearly I'm not.

Here's a retarded drawing.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Let It Stay

Hey, hey, let it stay
Let it chase the blues away
Butterfly shaped hearts
Are everybody’s favorite parts
Hey, hey, yesterday
I guess I somehow lost my way
Men who think little boys
Are nothing but pretty toys
they play all day long
And they know this song
When your ten you’re golden
At twenty one, you’re no fun
Hey, hey, boys in the sun
One plus one plus one
Remember that place
To go on rainy days
Hey, hey, let it stay
Let it chase the blues away.

!!IMPORTANT!! My friend Taylor(Antinon) wrote the most beautiful thing in the history of ever. It's an inpirational jounral, and EVERYONE, I mean EVERYONE, should read it.

Also... another poem, sorry. It sounds like it's about one person, but it's two girls I know, actually. They're not very similar, but I love them both a lot. Thinking about summer, I'm sometimes reminded of them, in a that's mostly a feeling and not a thought. It's so tender that it aches. I always try to put it into words.... I think this is my closest attempt.

I want to lift the smell of summer from your skin
And braid it like ribbons in my hair
Walk barefoot with you, step for step
Over brown, sun warmed lawns
Breath full of spearmint, laugher and heat
Shadow dappled shoulders and sneakers on the stoop
Cars that soak up the afternoon
Your pale legs stick to the leather seat,
Belts that bite your baby folds, boy knees knocking
You doze to the drone of ebbing traffic
The Saturday sun dies in the west
You dream of the softly fallen feet on concrete
The whispering of children
And clotheslines
My darling in the dark

Btw, I have to memorize THIS and recite it for school. D: >

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Don't eat the daisies, baby! <3

My mom got me hooked on this song, by Doris Day. x3

For something completely random, here's a silly game show in which pretty azn men play a game created solely as an excuse for teh gayz. (PART TWO PART TWO)

Yah, I know. I bring you such quality entertainment. :<

Belated New Years Resolutions

Alright! Better late than never. I've worked out my New Years Resolutions.

The concrete:
Get a job.
Hold aforementioned job.
Learn to drive.
Stop slouching.
Better personal hygiene.

The abstract:
Love people more.
Don't obsess.
DO more, THINK less.
Better self-confidence.
Stop playing that mind game.... that one where I give vague hints towards things and get angry when the hapless victim doesn't notice them.

Also, here are some things I drew today.

Monday, January 07, 2008

Hollywood Undead

And people say you dye your hair and wear tight jeans, that doesn't mean that you can't scream, or like loud noise, you got a choice, you have a voice.
-Knife called Lust by Hollywood Undead

But, oh man. School today, but I'm ridiculously pleased. Like this ball of ectoplasmic love right here.

He keeps cropping up in my MS Paint scribbles. I call him creepycat. I think he's symbolic but he might just be fun to draw. 8D

Friday, January 04, 2008

Irrelevant thought

I was thinking today. *SHOCKING*

It's so anti-productive to recruit dumb people for a cause. Convincing dumb people that your way is right is foolish because th person can lower the idea in three ways. a) They explain the issue to people in an uneducated way- IE, "I'm an animal rights activist, because otherwise people will step on puppies, and stuff." b) They will not spin the issue with enough positivity- IE "I support the troops because even if a bunch of people die, they died for a good cause." or c) They will lower it simply by being dumb. People won't respect them, and when they find out the person is a supporter of a certain cause, they wont respect the cause either.

Also, I support the telling of half-truths to children, including religion. Parents allow children to think that war is all about glory and freedom and that sex is all about love, so I see no reason that children shouldn't be taught that religion is all about love and heaven. It's not TRUE, but in every aspect of life, things are toned down for kids. I don't see why religion should be any different, but I've heard people say otherwise, so I thought I should throw that out there.

This is all irrelevant to me and my life. :3